It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Zombies (2 page)

We three spleens, you know where we are:

Two in the kitchen and one in the car.

We are still eating, people are fleeing.

Let’s eat the one in the car.

O-oooh, spleens of wonder, they taste right.

We could eat spleens all day and night.

We’re still eating, people screaming.

Let’s eat until first light.

Fresh brains roasting on an open fire,

Zombies chewing off your nose—

It all began when they ate the whole choir.

They’re even eating Eskimos.

Everybody knows a leg bone and someone’s toes

Make a Zombie’s season bright.

Tiny tots, with their eyes in a bowl,

Will find it hard to see tonight!

We know Zombie Santa’s on his way;

He’s eaten lots of boys and girls in his sleigh,

And every mother’s child is going to spy

To see if Zombie reindeer really know how to fly.

And so I’m running to get out of here

Before the Zombies eat me too.

Although it’s been said about the Undead,

If you don’t run, they will feast on you.

I’ll have an undead Christmas without you.

I’ll be so undead, and not thinking about you.

Hanging lots of red brains on a green Christmas tree

Won’t mean a thing if you’re not undead with me.

I’ll have an undead Christmas, that’s certain.

And when that Zombie bites me, I’m hurtin’.

You’ll be running all night, from every Zombie in sight,

And I’ll have an undead, undead Christmas.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Zombies

Everywhere you go.

They’re in the five and ten, eating brains once again,

Faces smeared with blood and all aglow!

It’s beginning to look a lot like Zombies!

They’re in every store!

But the scariest sight to see is the Zombies that will be

At your own front door.

There’s no need for boots, or a pistol that shoots,

Just the brains of Barney and Ben.

Zombies will stalk when you go for your walk,

And they’ll eat Janice and Jen.

And Mom and Dad, already turned, are eating brains again.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Zombies

Everywhere you go.

They’ve stormed the Grand Hotel, and filled the park as well.

They’re hungry and they sure don’t mind the snow!

It’s beginning to look a lot like Zombies!

Blood splattered on the floor!

But the scariest sight to see is the Zombies that will be

At your own front door!

Oh there’s nothing like brains for the holidays!

No matter how far away you roam,

When you’re hungry for the taste

Of someone else’s face,

For the holidays, you can’t beat

Brains, sweet brains!

I ate a man who lived in Tennessee,

And he was headed for Pennsylvania,

To go eat his mother’s eye.

From Pennsylvania folks are traveling down

To Dixie’s sunny shore.

From Atlantic to Pacific, gee!

The cerebrum tastes terrific!

Oh there’s nothing like brains

For the holidays! ’Cause no matter

How much your own mouth foams,

If you want to be happy in a million ways,

For the holidays, you can’t beat

Brains, sweet brains.

Undead moan, are you listening?

In the lane, blood is glistening.

A horrible sight,

We’re screaming tonight,

Runnin’ through a Zombie wonderland.

Already turned, is our neighbor!

Zombies here, I belabor.

They moan their own song,

As we scream along,

Sprintin’ through a Zombie wonderland.

In the meadow, we can beg for mercy.

They’ve already eaten Parson Brown.

They’ll come for us next,

And we’ll say, “No man!”

We’re getting’ the hell

Out of this town.

Later on, we’ll perspire,

As we scream, by the fire.

I’ll say we’re afraid

Of the Zombies they’ve made,

Runnin’ through a Zombie wonderland.

Good King Wenceslas tastes great;

We might as well eat Stephen,

When the brains lay round about,

Toasted crisp and bleedin’.

Brightly shown the moon that night,

Though the virus cruel.

When a poor man came in sight,

He made fine undead fuel.

Hither, Zombies chase after her.

Agnes, she is yelling.

Yonder peasant, how she screams,

For her brains they’re a-jelling.

Surely she will try to hide

Underneath the mountain,

Or deep in the forest hence

While Agnes is digestin’.

Bring me flesh, and bring me brains.

Bring me Zombies hither.

Thou and I will see them dine;

They even bite through leather.

Free and screaming, forth they went,

Zombies right behind them,

Through the poor souls’ wild lament.

Bitter brains are better.