One Summerhill Day (The Summerhill Series Book 1) (9 page)

Chapter Ten

Great, just fucking great. What better way to make a girl want you than to have a freaking PTSD episode in front of her and then go into an aura. Ryan slammed the door of his car and pulled out of her driveway, heading to his apartment.

Making matters worse, his dad had actually pulled her aside to talk to her. And what the hell had he said? Part of him wanted to go back to talk to him right now, but he was afraid of what he’d say. Maybe it would be better not to know. He loved his father, no matter what, and he knew his dad had his best interests at heart. Still, sometimes he needed to learn to
butt out.

And he knew he shouldn’t have rushed her out of there so quickly—it had been rude—but he couldn’t stand the look in their eyes whenever he showed any signs of cracking—that poor-Ryan
look he hated. The only one who never had that look was Jake, who had his own special look, though Ryan had yet to figure out what it meant. Jake, the brother he loved like no other, but hated at the same time… Okay, so hate wasn’t quite the right word, but even though he knew he should, he couldn’t get over the fact that his little brother had come home a hero, and he’d come home…this.

Shit, he was messed up. Just when he thought his life was taking a turn back toward normalcy, his past had reared its ugly head again. What the hell business did he have getting involved with Cait, anyway? He shouldn’t inflict his problems on a woman, particularly not one as nice as she was.

He kept beating himself up over his every action—from the way he’d avoided talking to her in the car to the middle-school kiss he’d landed on her outside her house—as he pulled into his apartment driveway. Running his hands down his face in frustration, he gave himself a silent lecture:
Go inside, sit in front of the TV, try to find a basketball game to watch. This day was and is no different than any other. You did your family duty, now you’ll go home and stare at sports. The memories will stay away.

Stalking into his living room, he tossed his cell phone onto the coffee table and his coat over the back of a chair before plopping down on his couch and grabbing for the remote. He found a North Carolina basketball game and leaned back on his couch. His text signal went off. He had heard it in the car a couple of times, but he’d chosen to ignore it. Maybe it was Cait telling him to get lost. There were tons of messages, but none from her.

Mallory:
Are you okay?

Ryan Sr.:
She’s a nice girl, Three.

Jake:
Can I come over?

Mallory:
Ryan, don’t do this. I know what you’re doing. She’s an RN. She can handle it. Don’t push her away.

Ryan laughed. Little too late for that advice, Mal. Maybe he should have checked his messages sooner after all.

He reached the most recent message, the one that had just been sent. It was another one from Mallory.

Mallory:
Ryan, talk to me.

Of all his siblings, Mallory was the most faithful, never-give-up, always-be-there-for-you sister. He picked up the phone and punched the keys.

Ryan:
I’m fine.

He sent it to all three.

Jake:
Can I come over? NC is on.

Ryan:
No. I’m tired.

The phone quieted, and he settled in to watch the game, though he didn’t really take in what was going on.

He must have fallen asleep for a while, because the next thing he knew, there was a blue line across the bottom of his screen.

“Winter storm warning for all counties in central and western New York. A winter storm warning is in effect until 10 p.m. tonight. Snow, high winds, and squall conditions will approach our region between 7 and 8 p.m. coming from the west, possibly bringing blizzard conditions to our area. Stay tuned for more information.”

The local TV station interrupted, repeating the storm warning and requesting that people stay off all major roadways. Storms were always dangerous, so they often needed to do overtime at the station to help out with any problems that arose. He called his supervisor. “I just saw the weather report. Do you need me to come in for overtime? I’m available to work tonight.”

“Thanks, Ryan, but not yet. Haven’t seen the storm yet. Charge your phone though, we may need you before the night is over. They’re expecting high winds, and you know how easily this town loses power.”

Ryan hung up and plugged his phone and his laptop into his charger. Then he settled back onto his couch, staring at the basketball game he wasn’t watching. He should probably call Cait, make sure she was okay, but he’d only just left her. It was five o’clock, and the storm wouldn’t roll in for a while. Maybe it would be best just to leave her alone for now. He closed his eyes, hoping he wouldn’t see any bombs in his sleep.

The next time he opened his eyes, all he saw was pitch black. The TV was off, the wind was howling, and his phone was ringing. He brushed the sleep from his eyes and sat up, adjusting his eyes to the darkness. No power. He fumbled his way to the kitchen to unplug his phone.

He held it up to his ear. “Yeah?”

Jake was on the other end. “What the hell? Can’t you answer a text?”

“I was sleeping.”

“Oh, well, the storm is here. I got called in to work. You?”

“No. I may have but I missed it. You need me?”

He heard some talking in the background on the other line. A few moments later, his brother returned to the phone. “Sarge said not yet. May need you later, so get some rest. Do you have power?”

“No. Is the whole town out?”

“Power’s out on the west side of the lake and half of Summerhill.”

“Shit.”

“What’s wrong?”

Ryan grabbed his jacket and his keys. “I’m going over to check on Cait.”

Jake said, “Good idea, but text her first. She may need some candles. Call me if you need anything.”

“Yep.” Ryan hung up and texted Cait.

Ryan:
You okay?

Cait:
Yes, but no power

Ryan:
Got candles?

Cait:
1

Ryan:
I’ll be right over.

Cait:
No, Ryan, it’s too dangerous. Stay put. I’ll be fine.

Ryan:
Be right there.

He shoved his phone in his pocket, grabbed matches and a few candles, including the girly one in the candleholder Mallory had given him, and left.

***

Caitlyn stood in the kitchen in the darkness, staring out the back window that faced the driveway, waiting for Ryan to pull in. Dr. Ramsay had showed her how to unhook the garage door opener manually in case she ever lost power. Thank goodness, because she hadn’t pulled her car into the garage until after she lost power. As soon as she saw Ryan’s lights, she would go open the garage door so he could park in the other space.

One thing she had already learned about the Ramsay men was that though they were men’s men, they knew how to take care of a woman. She’d known there would be no talking Ryan out of checking on her, so she’d just accepted it. He was a bit stubborn, but she had to admit she was relieved he was coming over. Her husband would have used the slippery roads as an excuse not to help her, but not Ryan. Somehow, she knew he would always go out of his way—even risk his own safety—to be there for her.

As soon as his headlights appeared in her driveway, she ran out and opened the garage door for him before running back near the door to stay warm. She was still in her sweatpants and sweatshirt, but at least she was warm.

Ryan climbed out of his car and said, “Are you crazy? I could have done that.” But even in the dark she could see his eyes were sparkling, and she was happy she’d thought to do such a little thing for him to show some appreciation for all he’d done for her.

He closed the garage door behind him and followed her into her house, knocking the snow off his boots and taking them off at the door before hanging his jacket on the peg above them. Caitlyn leaned against her breakfast counter, her one candle arranged on the coffee table between her two couches.

Ryan walked over and stood in front of her, setting the candles he’d brought on the counter.

Caitlyn crossed her arms in front of her in an attempt to ward off the cold. Though she felt bad he’d gone out of his way to be here, the truth was, she hadn’t been this happy to see anyone in a long, long time. Ryan’s brown hair curled over the collar of his shirt, and she wanted so desperately to reach out and run her hands through it. The soft glow of the candle highlighted his strong jaw line, and the scruff of his beard. She ached to touch him, but she didn’t know how he would receive it after the awkwardness of this afternoon. It was just too dark to see him.

She smiled instead. “Thanks for coming over.” The only thing she could hear was the howl of the wind outside and his erratic breathing. With one look, the brilliant green of his eyes just distinguishable in the glow of the candle, he lit her insides to a hot, raging flame of need.

“I had to,” he whispered.

She had no idea what he meant by that, but the heat of his body made her want to lean forward to absorb it. As he stood there, his gaze took a slow meandering journey down her body, pausing at her breasts long enough to cause her nipples to harden. She remembered she was braless when her erect buds brushed against the soft fabric of her sweatshirt. Thank goodness for the dark.

“I’m sorry, you had to what?” she asked, trying to keep her voice level.

“I had to come over.”

The desire in his gaze made her want to shout for joy.
Bring it on, Ryan Ramsay
, was all she could think. The way he looked at her made her feel like one of the most beautiful women on the planet. Visions of a shirtless Ryan standing over her filled her mind. She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She’d never wanted someone this way before; she’d never allowed herself to…

He cupped her cheeks and kissed her, a deep, ravishing kiss that invaded every inch of her, assaulted every nerve ending in her body. Her body had turned from an icicle to a pit of fire as he ran his hands down her back and tugged her against the bulge in his jeans. He pulled back for just long enough to say, “I needed to kiss you the way you deserve to be kissed…I didn’t do it right before.” He devoured her lips again, teasing her with his tongue until she wanted to strip in front of him and melt to the floor in a puddle at his feet.

Caitlyn tugged at his shirt, pulling it out of his pants. She wanted to squeal in delight as her hands met rock hard abs and then skated over a sprinkling of coarse hairs in the middle of his chest. She rubbed his skin, teasing him all the way up until she found his nipples and raked her nails across the tender tips.

He pulled away from her, sucking on her bottom lip before he reached for her sweatshirt. His hand stiffened as he felt her nakedness, and he sighed in pleasure. “You shouldn’t leave those beautiful breasts out for me to feel like that. Now I want to see them, to feel how beautiful they are.”

Caitlyn ripped her sweatshirt off and threw it across the room. “Here. They’re yours. Do what you want with them.” Surprised at her own boldness, she rested her hands on her hips giving Ryan a full view of her breasts.

Ryan groaned and leaned down to take her nipple in his mouth while he cupped her other breast with his hand. Caitlyn cried out as he suckled her, knowing she was beyond the point of stopping now. It didn’t matter. She wanted Ryan Ramsay. And she didn’t want to wait.

“Do you want this as much as I do, Cait?” His hand brushed her cheek as he waited for her answer. Always the gentleman.

“Yes. I want you, Ryan.” Her hands reached up and wove into his hair just before he dipped his head back down to lave her sensitive tips. Every caress and lick was enough to make her moan.

“Good—” he brought his gaze up to hers, “—because I want you really bad right now.” He kissed her neck and made a trail of caresses down her shoulder. “You are so beautiful.”

Caitlyn tugged on his shirt and between the two of them, they removed it along with her pants. The sight of his muscular chest, dusted with the perfect amount of dark hair, made her lick her lips. “Ryan, a condom. Do you have one?”

“Yeah.” His voice, deep and husky, shot straight to her core. He pulled one from his pocket, and she took a moment to appreciate the sight of him. She’d never been with a man like him before…all brawn and muscle and physicality. She reached his hands where he held the condom and she said, “Let me.”

“No, I’ve got it.”

“The couch, Ryan, the couch.”

While his hands reached down to drop his jeans and put on the condom, he stared at her, want and desire painted all over his face. “No, Cait, right here. Right now.”

He put his shirt underneath her and laid her carefully back on the lower part of the counter, moving her to the edge. And then he grasped her hips and slid into her, right there, on the kitchen counter in her brand new house. Ryan Ramsay made her scream and beg for more, something she had never done before.

Chapter Eleven

“Oh my God, Ryan,” Caitlyn whispered.

“Was it good for you?”

“Huh?” She stared at him, dazed.

“You came, didn’t you?” He stared at her as he fumbled with his pants, then reached down to help her sit up.

“Yes. Do you really need to ask?”

He laughed. “No. I could feel you. That was amazing, Cait.” He kissed her and then found her sweatshirt and pants on the floor. “Here, it’s getting a little cold in here.” He helped her slide it over her head. “C’mon, I’ll warm you up on the couch.” She walked over to the couch slowly, as if she was still dazed, and Ryan grinned. He was satisfied,
very
satisfied. It was the best sex he’d had in a long time, and in the dark and in that position, he was sure she had no idea. There would be no reason for her to suspect anything.

“Does the fireplace work?” He walked over and moved the grates, locating the poker at the side.

“Huh? Oh, yeah. It does, the inspector said it was in great shape, but I haven’t bought any wood or anything.”

“Didn’t I see a cord of wood in the garage?”

“I have no idea.” Her voice was dusky, and he grinned again. She’d clearly enjoyed herself as much as he had. He covered her with the throw on the back of the couch and said, “I’ll go check. I’ll be right back.”

A few minutes later, he returned with his arms full of wood. He set some in the basket next to the fireplace and arranged the rest inside it.

“Oh, is that what that’s for?” She huddled on the couch, the blanket tucked around her.

“How much more wood is out there?”

“Enough for a couple of days. We won’t keep it raging, just big enough to keep the chill away at night. You should probably close the door to the laundry room and the bathroom so we can keep this room warm.”

“How long is the storm supposed to last?”

“I don’t know. The warning was until ten tonight, but who knows how long we might be without power.” Ryan got the fire going, then got on the couch and wrapped his arms around Cait. “You okay?”

“Absolutely. I’m so glad you stopped over.”

“Me, too.”

“Ryan, I’m really sorry about today.” Cait rested her head on his shoulder.

“Why? You didn’t do anything wrong.” Damn, but he wish he could just get rid of the PTSD. Why did it have to continue messing with him? No, Cait hadn’t done anything wrong. She had done everything right simply because she hadn’t run away. That meant more to him than anything else she could have done.

“I’m sorry talking about my father brought up bad memories…and I shouldn’t have pushed you to talk before you were ready.”

“No problem. I should be the one to apologize to you. I regretted the way I rushed you out of there, then brought you home and dropped you at the door like an idiot. But when I have my episodes, I never talk much afterwards. They’re strange. What else did my father tell you?”

Caitlyn paused a moment before speaking. “He said you suffered from PTSD from your time in the army. He didn’t tell me what happened. He loves you very much, you know.” She had her hand on his arm, rubbing him gently, and he let the sensation sink in and soothe him. “The fire is starting to warm the house. Thanks for doing that. I appreciate all the things you do for me.”

“You’re welcome. I know my father loves me. He’s just trying to help, but sometimes he goes overboard.” He stopped and took a deep breath. This was as good a time as any. He wasn’t going to tell her everything, but it wouldn’t hurt to tell her something. “My leg was badly injured by a roadside bomb in Baghdad. That’s why I limp.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

His phone went off with four text messages that arrived one after another. He got up and pulled it out of his jacket. Not his boss, fortunately. He had no desire to leave Cait yet.

Ryan Sr.:
Thunderstorm

Mallory:
There’s a thunderstorm coming. Odd for it to arrive in a snow storm, but apparently it’s already hit south of Buffalo. Where are you? Want me to come over?

Jake:
Thunder snow in Buffalo. Working till eight a.m., but Sarge doesn’t need you. Maybe tomorrow early.

Blake:
Thunder snow. Get off the road if you’re driving.

Cait looked at him with raised eyebrows. “What is it? Is everyone okay?”

“Yes, but there’s a thunderstorm coming this way.” He texted his response, letting his family know he was safe.

Ryan:
I’m at Cait’s. No problem

“In the snow? I’ve never seen one in the winter before.” She scowled at him. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’ve seen them before. They’re not nice. Maybe I should go home.”

“Why? I have to be honest. I’d like it if you stayed. No power, storming, howling wind, thunderstorm. Please stay?”

Ryan sighed, letting himself bask in the warmth of her words as he drew her close and tucked her head under his chin. “I don’t know, Cait. Thunderstorms bother me.”

“Really?” It suddenly dawned on her why. “Oh, the thunder sounds like an explosion. That makes sense. I’m sorry, but wouldn’t it be better to have someone around you? I’ll help you get through it.”

Ryan thought about how she had been at the family inn. She had simply held his hand to show him her support, not staring at him, not embarrassing him. Maybe he could chance it. His sister was right—she was a nurse. Even though his episodes weren’t really seizures, they did wreak havoc on his mind. And it wasn’t like anything bad had ever happened; he had never hurt anyone—at least not yet. It was just like his worst memories exploded in his mind and incapacitated him.

“All right, I’ll stay. But don’t take anything I say or do personally. Promise?”

“I promise.”

Ryan decided to ask her about her marriage. “Have you heard from your husband?”

“No. I probably won’t since he signed the papers.”

Ryan had a hard time believing that he wouldn’t have tried to get more money from her. She must have been very generous. From what he’d found out about Bruce Dalton—particularly the man’s gambling problem—he’d assumed the guy would try to get a ton of money from Caitlyn. “If he ever bothers you, will you promise to call me?”

“Yes, I will. But I don’t think he’ll contact me if he hasn’t done it by now.”

“Even if I’m working, I want you to call me. I don’t like that fact that you’re here alone in this house.” He kissed her forehead.

“I’ll be fine, Ryan. Thank you.”

He decided to ask her the tough question. “Pretty unusual for a marriage to end so quickly. Do you mind if I ask what happened?”

“I guess we know each other well enough now.” She smiled and raised her eyebrows. “I came home early from a twelve-hour shift one day, and I caught him cheating with my best friend. She was on her knees in front of him in my living room.”

“Ouch. I’m sorry.” Ryan winced, then rubbed her back.

“I’m not. On my drive up to New York, I thought a lot about our last year together. Our first year wasn’t too bad, but the last year was terrible. He couldn’t find a job, not that he seemed to care, and he wanted to travel to places that didn’t interest me. He really changed. Or maybe it just took me too long to figure him out.”

“Really? Where did he want to travel?”

“Las Vegas for one. I never wanted to go, but he liked to gamble, which was another source of argument for us.”

A bright shard of lightning streaked across the sky, followed by a loud clap of thunder. Caitlyn stared at Ryan, as if anxious to see his reaction. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, but you don’t have to keep asking me that. You’ll know.” He stood up. “Do you mind if I close the blinds? I’d like to block out the lightning as much as possible.” He walked over to the windows and was starting to close the drapes when another bright streak zipped across the sky, the thunder seconds behind. Ryan’s arms came up in reaction, protecting his face from something.

They had been driving down a road in Baghdad when the bomb exploded underneath their vehicle. He and Chad were the only ones inside; Jake was in the vehicle in front of him. The entire vehicle flipped on its side, tossing him and Chad around. The door was blown off the one side and fragments of hot, jagged metal blasted everywhere.

And oh, it had hurt so very bad.

He closed his eyes as another loud clap of thunder echoed over the lake, and just like that, he was right back in Iraq, back in that awful, awful moment following the explosion. The sound temporarily deafened him. He stared at his friend, who sat slumped in the seat next to him, unmoving. He hung onto a metal bar over his head, but he couldn’t figure out why he had to hang on. He didn’t even know which way was up. Another explosion went off in the distance, the light blinding him, causing him to put his hands up to cover his face.

He tried to reach Chad, but he couldn’t. Blood covered Chad’s chest and he could tell he was gasping for air. He stuck his head out of the vehicle and saw Jake crouched on the ground shooting…and a line of insurgents firing back. He and Chad were directly in the line of fire.

He started to move toward Chad, but he yelled out as pain shot up his leg. He grabbed it and looked down at the blood soaking his pants. The material had been shredded by shrapnel, shards of the truck embedded in his leg, parts of his bone visible.

It didn’t matter, he had to get Chad out.

The next thing he remembered, he was on the ground hidden behind a copse of bushes, Chad was staring at him, trying to say something. All Ryan could make out was that his friend was asking him to take care of someone. A shard of pain ripped through his body, arching his back off the ground. His ears were deafened by someone’s screams, and it took him a while to realize they were his own.

Bombs went off around his head, getting closer and closer, each one louder than the one before.

“
Ryan
.”

He turned to search for whoever had called out his name. It was a beautiful, soothing voice. Not his mother, she was gone.

“Ryan!” A hand grasped his wrist and another one wrapped around his waist. “Ryan, please come sit with me.”

He glanced at her. Cait. Damn, she was beautiful. Cait, the one who didn’t judge him, didn’t pity him. He stared at her, taking in everything about her. She was such a good person, and he wanted to commit everything about her to memory. Her eyes, her pouty lips, the concern in her gaze. It wasn’t pity, which he appreciated more than he could express.

“Ryan, I’m cold. Will you sit on the couch with me and hold me? I need your warmth.”

“Sure, Cait,” he said simply, so grateful she wasn’t asking him to talk about it. He put his arm around her shoulder and led her over to the couch. They settled on the chaise end of the couch and he wrapped her in his embrace. He settled his head on her shoulder and closed his eyes for just a moment, just long enough to stop the bombs in his vision. Something told him that he could stay with this woman forever.

The next time he awoke, he heard only silence. He glanced around the room and listened. The thunderstorm had ended, and the wind had died down. His arms were still around Cait, but his grip was looser now. He picked up his head and found her staring at him.

She smiled. “Better?”

“Yeah. Thanks, Cait.” He breathed in her scent, letting it calm him. This episode hadn’t been too bad. In fact, he thought it had definitely been shorter than the last one he’d suffered in a thunderstorm.

And she hadn’t kicked him out or turned away from him. Nor was she sending him away now that he was awake. Instead she was looking at him with kindness and understanding in her eyes—that special look that made him feel like it was all actually going to be okay. He remembered making love to her, remembered how glorious they had been together.

“It’s all right, Ryan. I don’t mind. Just tell me what I can do to help.”

He didn’t say anything, just kissed her cheek and grabbed for her hand. He rested his head back on her shoulder and sighed. “Cait?”

“Yes?”

“The bomb destroyed my lower leg. I wear a prosthesis.”