Shelter (5 page)

“Are you hungry?” he asked.

“I am,” I admitted, hanging my head in shame. I couldn’t tell him what it was I really wanted to eat.

“Me, too,” he said. “Why don’t we head back to my place and grab something to eat?”

I frowned. I didn’t like the thought of leaving this wondrous place and going back to that noisy party.

“We don’t have to go inside,” he said. “I have snacks in the shed.”

“Oh, thank goodness,” I breathed a sigh of relief.

We were both pretty quiet on the way back to Kai’s house. On the way, I began to wonder about the story regarding my father’s death. It hadn’t even occurred to me all night that my mother had just told me hours earlier that my father had died at Kai’s house. Suddenly, it was all I could think of.

“What’s wrong?” Kai asked, apparently picking up on my change in mood.

“Nothing,” I lied.

I turned my head to look out the car window. I watched buildings flash by as we drove – a welcome distraction from my curiosity. Kai must have sensed my discomfort, so he switched on the stereo. He had an MP3 player hooked up, and while we were stopped at a red light, he flicked through his playlists and chose one he was sure I would like.

The familiar sound of “Für Elise” began to play, and it instantly relaxed me. There was something about classical music that always comforted me, and I admit that I was more than a little surprised that Kai had a classical music playlist. Now I was curious about what else he liked to listen to.

I eyeballed his MP3 player, longing to take a peek at his playlists, but I didn’t want to intrude. Admittedly, I would be rather annoyed if someone I just met started snooping through my music without asking.

Suddenly, I blurted out, “Can I look at your playlists?”

Kai glanced at me and gave me a crooked smile.

“Be my guest,” he said.

I picked up the player and started nosing around through his music. He had two different playlists with classical music. One was mostly classical piano – my personal favorite. The other had a lot of orchestral compositions, some of which I wasn’t even familiar with. I’d never really listened to symphonies much.

He also had a playlist full of nineties hair metal. That was interesting. My brother had a thing for that stuff, too. I enjoyed some of it. I certainly didn’t hate it, but it wasn’t my favorite.

Another playlist contained a bunch of love songs – mostly stuff from the seventies and eighties. I wasn’t too familiar with human males, obviously, but it did occur to me that it seemed unusual that a guy would have a bunch of romantic music on his MP3 player. Then again, Kai seemed anything but ordinary. He was nothing like the human guys I’d seen on television or in movies.

That was it as far as playlists. It was a lot like my own. My computer at home had a grand total of six playlists. Five of them were classical piano playlists – each one created to fit a certain mood. The final playlist was mostly eighties music. I picked up a taste for it while watching those cheesy eighties movies. I don’t know why, but those movies really stuck a chord with me. Probably because they portray social awkwardness – a feeling I was painfully aware of.

When Kai pulled up to the curb and parked, the party had broken up. It was only eleven-thirty, so it seemed unusual that everyone was gone. Kai suggested things got boring so people headed out, but something didn’t seem quite right about it. He didn’t bother pulling into the garage.

“Oh, well,” Kai said. “At least we can get better food in the house.”

The house was completely dark, but I could see paper cups and garbage everywhere. His house was completely trashed, and it smelled strongly of beer. I followed him through the back door and into the kitchen.

Kai was bent over looking through the refrigerator when I heard a faint rustle behind me and suddenly smelled the nauseating scent of blood heavily laced with liquor. I turned just in time to see an angry looking woman breeze into the kitchen and storm over toward Kai. I suddenly became very uncomfortable, and I pressed myself against the wall to try to avoid detection.

“Kai!” she screeched in a shrill voice. “What have you done to this house?”

“Mom!” he shouted, slamming the refrigerator door and jumping backward.

“Yeah, you didn’t expect me back until the weekend, did you?” she yelled at him, pointing her waggling finger directly in his face. “I should have known you’d pull some shit like this!”

The woman viciously struck Kai across the face, and he recoiled. I jumped – startled. I wanted to say something, but I was afraid. I don’t know why I felt such fear. I could have ripped her to shreds. Somehow, though, I couldn’t move. I held my breath, and closed my eyes.

“You’re a pathetic piece of shit!” she shouted, and I smelled the overwhelming scent of liquor emanating from her general direction. “You’re worthless! You can’t even keep the house straight for two goddamned weeks! You have a party as soon as my back is turned? Did you think you could get away with that?”

“No, Mom,” he tried to explain. “It was Van. He…”

“Liar! Don’t blame your cousin for your stupidity! If you were more like Van, we’d all be better off! You’re just trash! That’s all you’ve ever been, and that’s all you ever will be!”

My lower lip began to tremble, and I felt my fists clench. I gritted my teeth together, trying to contain the strange mixture of fear and rage that suddenly began to overtake my body and my mind.

The slight woman grabbed Kai by the hair and shoved him against the counter. She reached over and turned one of the knobs on the stove, and blue flames shot up from one of the eyes. Still holding him by the hair with her left hand, she grabbed Kai’s left hand with her right and shoved it toward the flames, and he screamed out in pain.

I was horrified. I wanted to do something, but I couldn’t move. I’d been holding my breath for so long, I could feel myself getting lightheaded, and suddenly tears began to well up in my eyes.

I couldn’t bear it. My entire body began to tremble violently. I saw brief flashes of a hazy, reddish fog before my eyes, and I shut my eyes tightly, trying to block out the scene in front of me. I could feel a surge of violence begin to wash over me, and I was afraid of what I might do. Despite my best efforts to remain undetected, a shuddering growl escaped my lips. I gasped, and covered my mouth, but it was too late. I’d been detected.

The woman wheeled around to face me with fire in her eyes. For a moment, I was afraid she might strike me. I knew my instinct would kick in if she did, and I would hurt her. I didn’t want that. Fortunately, she just glared at me in shock for a moment and grabbed her car keys off the table, heading for the door.

“Mom, no!” Kai shouted, chasing after her. “You can’t drive like this!”

He tried to grab the keys from his mother’s hand, but she snatched them away.

“Don’t tell me what to do, you miserable fuck-up! I wish you were dead!” she screamed.

Kai watched helplessly as his mother barged out the door, got into her car, and sped away. For a moment, I was still frozen in place. Then I ran to him and grabbed his hand. Even in the dark, I could see it was badly burned.

“Oh, Kai,” I whispered, horrified.

“I’m fine,” he said, shaking his head. I could feel his hand trembling in mine.

My eyes began to sting as tears filled them. I couldn’t stand this. I’d never in my life witnessed something so completely heartbreaking. Kai’s own mother had hurt him this way, and then he tried to keep her from driving drunk. He was protecting the woman who had just treated him like a worthless piece of trash. A moment earlier, I felt like I could rip her apart.

Kai stood there, motionless. I couldn’t tell what he was feeling until he suddenly collapsed on the floor, sobbing. Instantly, I fell to the floor beside him. Instinctively, I wrapped my arms around him. He trembled violently as I held him, and he cried harder than I’d ever seen anyone cry before.

I’d seen a lot of emotional movies, but nothing could have prepared me for this. The vampires I knew were rarely so emotional, so the sensation was foreign. My heart ached for him. I’d never felt such a deep emotion in my entire life. I almost felt human, or at least what I imagined it would be like.

I tried to hold him as close to me as I could. I knelt there beside him, trying to pull him into my arms and shelter him. I wanted to comfort him. I wanted to take away what had just happened to him. I’d have given anything to be able to do so at that moment.

I rested my head against his, and I noticed how intoxicating he smelled. His hair had an indescribable scent that was somewhere between fresh-baked bread and French fries. I don’t know how I could even notice after what I’d just witnessed, but it lingered with me. It wasn’t like anything I’d ever smelled before.

He sat on the floor with his knees in front of him, wrapping his arms around them as I had at the beach. I remembered how anxious and alone I felt, and I wondered if he was feeling the same way. My left arm wrapped around his arms, and my right arm cradled his head. My right hand reached around to his forehead, and I pushed his long hair gently away from his face.

With his left hand, he grabbed my left wrist, and he reached across with his right arm to pull my left arm tighter to him. He began to rock back and forth as he cried, and I tried to comfort him by whispering softly to him.

“Shh…” I shushed into his ear. “I’m here.”

It was all so unbearable. It was like the pain he was feeling was penetrating my soul – piercing my heart with a razor-sharp blade. I never imagined I could
feel
with such intensity. To go from an empty, nearly emotionless shell to such passion of feeling so rapidly was maddening.

I wanted to pull him into my embrace and let him get lost there. He was so weak and so gentle. All I wanted was to be the person to protect and comfort him. I wanted to shelter him from every horrible thing in the world.

Suddenly, I wanted to kiss him. I knew it was highly inappropriate to want to such a thing at that moment, especially considering we’d just met that night, but the feeling was overwhelming. As I sat there cradling him, I could little understand what was happening. I just knew if I didn’t kiss him I would go crazy.

I didn’t have to worry about impropriety for long. Seconds after I developed the overwhelming urge to kiss him, I felt his lips on mine. He’d pulled me across his lap, and he was pressing his lips urgently against my own. I could feel his tears against my face, and his strong arms wrapped around me and pulled me into his grasp.

It’s still difficult to explain the intensity of that moment. I know I had only known him for a few hours, but in that moment… it felt like a lifetime. As his arms wrapped around me and his lips searched mine for comfort, I thought of nothing else. Suddenly, the whole world disappeared and there was nothing left but Kai and me.

I felt his fingers tangle in my hair as he struggled to pull me even further in. I gasped aloud, unable to contain the indescribable passion I felt in that kiss. My own fingers wrapped inside his hair, and I allowed myself to become lost in the moment.

As quickly as it started, it was over. He struggled to his feet and backed away from me. I sat in the floor and gawked up at him, unsure what had just happened. One moment, we were kissing in breathless passion, and the next moment he was distant – even cold.

He shook his head slowly, backing away from me one fragile step at a time. I reached my hand toward him, and he recoiled. His deep red hair hung wild and tangled around his face, and his breath was ragged and almost vicious. He wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve, tugging at his lips so hard it looked as though it might’ve hurt. He turned and quickly fled out the back door.

For a long while, I sat in the floor and tried to assess the situation. I hadn’t done anything wrong – I was certain of that. Surely, it couldn’t have been that he hated the kiss. But then I thought that maybe it could have been. It was my first kiss, after all. That realization also hit me at that moment. I’d just had my first kiss. And it had been with a human! And I hadn’t eaten him!

More than anything, though, I just wanted to know if Kai was okay. The burn on his hand had been terrible, and I was even more worried about his emotional state. I still couldn’t believe what I’d just witnessed. To think that a mother could treat her own son that way – it was unimaginable.

Maybe he wanted to be alone. For a moment, I thought it was best if I just called Will to come pick me up. But I was so overcome with worry about Kai, I couldn’t leave. I had to see if he was okay.

I stood up and headed toward the shed. I figured that’s where he’d be. There was a faint golden glow coming from the windows. I approached the door with consternation swelling within me, but I summoned the courage to knock gently.

“Go away,” he answered, his voice uneven.

“Kai, please,” I called to him.

“Leave me alone!” he shouted.

I sighed.

“Kai,” I said again, “please let me in.”

“No!” he yelled through the closed door. “I need to be alone!”

I opened my mouth to protest, but I didn’t think it would do any good. Still, I couldn’t leave him. I pressed my back against the outer wall of the shed and slid down to the ground. I landed with a thud, and I pulled my legs up against me and hugged them close – trying to comfort myself.