In the Zone (Portland Storm 5) (34 page)

It’s just me and you

No pain, now we’re free

No one here to see

Lost and found

Sight and sound

All is gone

We are one

In this night of open spaces

Empty faces

Broken lives

Can’t return to the start

Wounded heart

Darkness thrives

With lyrics like those, it could easily be interpreted as a song of two broken people coming together to complete each other with love. There was no better way to represent that through Latin ballroom than with the rumba.

“Right,” I said finally, resigning myself to the fact that I was going to have to get over myself enough to work on yet another sensual dance with Devin—this one to be recorded in video to preserve it for all the world to see. “Rumba it is, then.”

“That one’s the bedroom dance, right?”

I jumped at the sound of Keith’s voice, and I didn’t need a mirror to know I was blushing like an idiot again. He could do that to me without even trying.

“That it is,” Devin agreed, grinning at me as though he was in on a joke.

“Good.” Keith leaned against the doorjamb almost casually, but he wasn’t fooling me. “I can’t wait to see that one. But it’ll have to wait because I’m starving and dinner’s ready. Let’s eat.”

Devin helped me to my feet and then turned off the music. Without anything better to do with myself, I crossed the floor to where Keith was waiting for me. He pulled me in for a kiss, keeping his hands on my waist with such a fierce resolve that I wondered if I’d be sore when he released me. I wasn’t; I was only hungry for more of his touch.

But that was going to have to wait, too.

“Are you three coming or what?” Shane shouted down the stairs. “Cole’s so hungry he might eat one of the dogs if we don’t feed him soon.”

“No one’s eating any of my dogs,” Keith returned, laughing. He took my hand and pulled me along after him as we went up the stairs, Devin following close behind us.

“Fine,” Cole said when we came into the kitchen. “A cat, then.”

Shane winked at me, and I rolled my eyes.

“Based on how it smells in here,” I said, my stomach grumbling in response to the savory scent of burgers and homemade fries, “I have the distinct feeling that won’t be necessary.”

Everyone fixed up plates, talking over each other, laughing, and having a good time. Cole, Shane, and Devin carried their plates into the living room to camp out in front of the TV. We were apparently going to watch another Christmas special tonight. I was about to follow them when Keith put an arm around my waist and drew me in for another kiss. He lingered over it for a minute, and I reveled in the sensation of his lips against mine.

“There
is
a pussy I wouldn’t mind eating,” he whispered seductively in my ear, and I shivered at the memory of what his tongue could do. “Maybe for dessert?”

I tried to slow my pulse, to remember how to breathe, but it felt as though I was asking too much of myself in the attempt.

“Maybe,” I said. I met his gaze, saw the hunger there that matched my own. Then I picked up my plate and glass, and I headed in to join the others in the living room.

At least that would give me a little time to figure out if that was the right move to make, or if we were once again rushing into things. I wasn’t sure of much, but there wasn’t a doubt in my mind about this one thing: once I went to bed with Keith again, there would be no more putting on the brakes, no more opportunity to slow things down. It would be full-steam ahead and no looking back.

I had to be certain that was what I wanted.

I
T WAS ALMOST
midnight. Devin had left a few hours ago. Colesy and Shane had called it a night around eleven and gone upstairs, leaving me alone with Brie, my dogs, and BC.

BC was by far the more adventurous of Brie’s two cats, and yesterday he’d decided that he’d had enough of being confined when everyone was out and about. Richie was still staying hidden away in his sanctuary, but BC had struck out to explore the entire house, sneaking past Brie at one point when she’d had the door open.

Not only was he feeling his way around the place, but he’d also shown my dogs that he was the boss. Shadow and Dexter had sniffed his butt and decided to let him have his way pretty quickly, but Pepper wasn’t so sure she wanted to be bossed around by a feline. She’d tried to assert her own dominance until the little guy had hissed and growled at her, his hackles raised, and then taken a swat at her nose. He hadn’t gotten her with his claws, but he’d scared her enough with his show of dominance that she’d whimpered and scampered off to hide in plain sight on my lap, as though I would protect her from the mean kitty. This made me fairly certain that she had no earthly clue how big she was.

It also made me start thinking about what it might be like if Brie and her cats were to ever come here to stay, not only for a few days at Christmas. I was starting to think it would work out. Yes, Richie was still in hiding, at least any time that anyone else was around, but Brie swore that he always hid more than he was ever out and about. He was scared of everything, she said. My house was big enough that he could find lots of good hiding places, if he got brave enough to explore and find them. If
he
could settle in here, there was no reason that they couldn’t all settle in.

Other than the fact that I had no idea where Brie stood on our relationship. I knew where I stood. Sometime in the last few days, I’d realized I was in love with her. It wasn’t just some passing fascination. It wasn’t simply lust. I wanted a hell of a lot more than merely getting her to come back to my bed, although I certainly wouldn’t shoot her down if she decided she was ready for that again. I supposed I’d been in love with her for a while. Why else would I have agreed to back off, when all I wanted was to take things to the next level? I wanted to be with her every moment of every day, but I had no idea when Brie was going to be willing to take our relationship up a notch.

Until now, at least.

Maybe
kept floating through my head from when she’d said it earlier. I’d chewed it over, letting that single word roll around in my mind, analyzing everything about the way she’d said it and her tone of voice when the word had spilled from her lips.

Was she ready? Had I proven that I could be real with her, that I could open up to her and share my life and who I was, and not rely strictly on our physical connection as the basis for our relationship? I thought I had. But then again, I’d thought I had gone far enough toward that when I’d first told her about Garrett. That had only been enough to convince her to kiss me again.

But we’d spent hours and hours over the last few days talking about everything under the moon. I’d told her how I’d struggled with boredom during my early years in school, and the only way my parents had been able to keep me from failing and get me to actually put forth any effort was to threaten me with not being allowed to play hockey. For a while, they hadn’t been sure if I’d even graduate from high school, but I’d done well enough that I’d gone on to college.

She’d told me how the thyroid issues that had caused her weight gain had also messed up her vision, and that was why she always wore those glasses. She’d tried contacts, but she’d never been able to adjust to them—especially since her vision seemed to change far more often than was typical for someone of her age—so she’d given in and resigned herself to always wearing glasses. It was yet another thing that made her self-conscious, much like her weight. She thought they made her unattractive. I’d made a mental note when she told me that to increase my efforts to let her know how beautiful she was, as often as possible. I didn’t want her to ever doubt herself, not in any way.

Even now, as we sat in the dark, with only the soft white radiance of the Christmas tree I’d put up before the party to see by, I was amazed by her beauty. She practically glowed in this lighting, similar to the candlelight on our first date but with a softer quality. She’d allowed me to wrap my arms around her and hold her close to my side, leaning her back against my chest, and the lights bounced off her glasses and danced with every breath she took. It was intoxicating to watch her like this, to hold her in such a way.

It felt as right as anything in my life had ever felt. Probably because I was in love with her, and being able to love again, having someone to love, was something I hadn’t realized I was missing.

I didn’t want to end the moment, but that single word kept haunting my thoughts.
Maybe
. Should I prod her to see if her
maybe
had turned to a
yes
? I’d promised myself I would let things go at her pace, that I wouldn’t push her for more than she was ready for. But did asking count as pushing?

I hadn’t made up my mind yet what I should do when she turned her head to me and placed a kiss on my jaw.

“I have something for you,” she murmured. “A Christmas present.”

That made me feel like an ass. “I didn’t get anything for you.” I’d thought that since we were technically still just supposed to be friends right now, regardless of the fact that we weren’t really acting much like friends, a gift might be overstepping where we were in our relationship.

“You’ve been letting me stay here for days,” she said, standing up. “That’s more than enough of a gift. Besides, you’ve already given me something.”

Had I? I’d given her my heart, but I wasn’t sure she knew that yet.

She headed toward the stairs to go down, and I started to follow her, but she shook her head. “Stay there. I’ll be back in a minute.”

I sat back against the couch cushions, and BC came over to claim the warm spot Brie had just vacated. Pepper gave him the evil eye, but she didn’t move to warn him off. He circled around a few times and then plopped down beside me, purring like a Harley-Davidson. The look he tossed my direction was one of pure contentment.

Brie was gone more than a minute, and I couldn’t stop my mind from racing, trying to figure out what she intended to give me. The only thing I wanted was her, all of her—in my bed, in my life—but if that was what I was getting, she wouldn’t be downstairs while I was sitting here surrounded by our pets. Would she?

Just when I thought I wouldn’t be able to sit still and wait for her even one minute longer, she reappeared at the top of the stairs. She’d changed out of her clothes, and her hair was loose around her shoulders, and she had on a black satin robe that was belted around her waist and fell slightly over her knees. It showed off her shapely calves, hugged her curvy hips, and gave me the most perfect peek at her cleavage. She had something in one hand that she was taking care to hide behind her.

I’d bought her that robe, along with the nightgown she’d worn the other night, and about a dozen other things. My thoughts went from zero to sixty in about a half-second flat, wondering what she had on underneath the robe, if anything.

She stood there, her nerves apparently so erratic that I could see the rapid rise and fall of her breasts with each shuddering breath she took. My mouth went dry, my jaw slack. I wanted her more than I wanted my heart to keep beating, but she’d frozen in place when she reached the top of the stairs and she hadn’t moved a muscle since.

Everything in me was screaming to cross over to her and undo her the belt, to pick her up in my arms and carry her up the stairs so I could make love to her, but I stayed right where I was, forcing myself to do nothing more than take her in.

She licked her lips and looked away, her gaze heading toward the stairs going up—the stairs closest to my bedroom. “I, um…” When she looked at me again, her face was pink, but her gaze was direct. “Will you take me upstairs so I can show you your present?”