Forget Me Not (19 page)

“He got my eye,” he continues, pointing to a small scar on his eyebrow. I reach for it, pulling his face down to me so I can kiss it. “He stopped when I fell, but told me if I ever raised my hand to him again he’d have no problem pulling the trigger. I knew I couldn’t live under his control anymore, so I left.”

“I’m so glad you did.”

“Even if it led to me leaving you?”

I cock my head at him, confused and a little hurt that he’d think otherwise. “You really think I would rather you had stayed and put your life at risk than be without you? Do you think I’m that selfish?”

“No…no. I’ve just been worrying that you wouldn’t understand. That you’d think I didn’t fight for us…for you.”

His hands have found their way to my waist, and mine to his face. I’m so happy that there’s no space between us now. I never want to let him go again.

“I wish you’d never fought for me at all. If you hadn’t then you never would’ve had to have gone through what you did.”

“I couldn’t let him talk about you like that...I was defending your honor,” he adds, attempting a smile.

“Well, for future reference. Don’t.” I smile back.

“I will always defend you,” he insists, adopting a serious expression once more.

I sigh, not wanting to argue about his over-protectiveness. “Thank you for telling me. You really didn’t have to, but I’m glad you felt like you could.”

“I want to tell you everything. No secrets anymore, sweets. I want you to know my soul as well as I do, and I want to know yours.”

I couldn’t have put it any better myself. I want to know him inside out. The good and the bad, and I want to balance out the bad by making everything from this moment on as good as they can be. I want him to feel nothing but alive and happy when he is with me. His happiness is just as important as my own. More so.

“I love you,” he whispers before kissing me so cautiously that I could cry.

He turns so that my back is against the wall, his body perfectly pressed to mine, arms and legs entwined. I press myself against him harder, parting my lips to invite his tongue. He obliges, and we burn off the last of our accumulated passion in a hungry kiss. When he pulls away his breathing is ragged and his eyes are heated with fiery intentions.

“Do we have time?” he asks, hopefully.

I glance at my new watch and feel a pang of disappointment when I see that we don’t. I don’t need to tell him, my regret is obvious.

He shrugs. “Come on,” he says, pushing himself away from me.

In a split second he’s falling backwards, arms flailing wildly as he attempts to right himself. I don’t have time to grab him, not that my feeble strength would be able to compete with gravity. With an almighty splash he lands on his ass in the water. His hands are in his lap, resigned to being wet.

I cover my mouth, trying desperately to conceal my laughter. It just feels wrong to laugh after everything he has just shared with me.

              Jesse stands up, allowing the water to cascade off him. He looks ridiculous, adorable and sexy all at the same time, and he’s laughing. He’s able to laugh.

             
“I guess I needed to cool off,” he chuckles.

             
With that, I’m balling. I can’t stop laughing. It’s loud and unattractive, but I don’t care. It’s cleansing.

“Oh, you’re laughing? Would you be laughing if
you
were this wet?” he asks, creeping closer with mischief in his eyes. His intentions are perfectly clear.

“Oh no. No, you don’t,” I warn, pointing a finger at him.

He makes a lunge for me and effectively catches my hand. Ignoring my squeals of protest he pulls me into the water. It only reaches a little up my calf and it’s warm, but my shoes are ruined.

“My shoes,” I pout.

“I’ll buy you a million more if you kiss me.”

“You can’t buy me, Mr. Jenner.”

“Even with shoes?”

I pretend to think about it for a second before I kiss him. It’s a silly, over the top kiss that ends with him dipping me, Hollywood style.

“Come on,” he says, and proceeds to give me a piggy back ride to my car.

It amazes me how he can be so intense one minute and so relaxed the next. I think that’s what I love most of all about him. He doesn’t dwell on his misfortunes. He doesn’t pity himself. The very fact that he has kept this secret to himself for all of these years is proof enough of that. I’m glad he’s told me, and I hope that it enables him to move on from such a scarring event, but I vow to spend the rest of our day talking about the here and now, not dwelling on the past.

After spending the last hour showering, exfoliating, and moisturizing I’m now working on my hair. I’ve dried it and I’m currently attempting to tease in some loose curls. It’s a lengthy process, but luckily Benji is preoccupied with Jesse’s tablet and its library of newly purchased games.

I’m starting on my make-up when Jesse enters my bedroom wearing nothing but a towel slung low around his hips. Fresh from the shower, his hair is dripping wet and his skin is tinted pink with heat. His magnificence is verified by my physical response; my mouth waters and I have to take a large gulp before I’m even able to speak.

“Are you kidding me?” I fret.

“What?”

“You’re in nothing but a towel when I’m trying to get ready? Give a girl a chance, it’s very distracting,” I say teasingly, but meaning every word.

He strolls over to me with such grace that my bedroom floor could be his own personal catwalk. He leans onto the back of my chair and regards me through the mirror on my dressing table. Blue eyes penetrate the glass so intensely that it is entirely conceivable for it to shatter into a million pieces.

Leaning further into my already stimulated space, he places his lips against my ear. “I’d like to remind you that you are also in just a towel, and that’s even more distracting.” He kisses me sweetly on my shoulder and I close my eyes, savoring his touch. “Very, very distracting.”

Wet kisses line their way back up to my ear and I lean into them. My body is boneless as I succumb to his sudden seduction. His fingers feather the length of my arm as his mouth continues to tease my ear.

“You look amazing. I think you should just wear this tonight,” he croons into my hair and tugs pointedly at my towel. “In fact…” In one swift movement he has completely disrobed me. I gasp and open my eyes, meeting his wild gaze in the mirror before us.

“Jesse,” I breathe. “There’s no time.”

“There’s always time.”

I can’t refuse him, not when his talented hands have found their way to my breasts. I’m mesmerized by the reflected image of us both. My hands have snaked up into his hair, we’re entwined. We fit together perfectly and it’s a delight to see. Jesse sees it too. His wicked smile is evident of that.

Both of our eyes are trained on his teasing fingers as they tumble over the skin of my breasts, my ribs, my stomach, until they reach down between my thighs. I gasp loudly, both shocked and awed. I’m already hovering on the edge of control when he spins me around to face him. He’s on his knees between my legs, angled and ready, when a voice calls up from downstairs.

“Hi, Mickey! I’m here now!” Zoe calls.

Grabbing Jesse’s hands and restraining him, I call back. “Okay, I’ll be five minutes!”

“I can do a lot in five minutes,” Jesse whispers, leaning in and kissing the corner of my mouth invitingly.

“You are relentless!” I push him back and hold onto the sides of the seat as I steady both my breath and my errant thoughts. He laughs, and stalks away easily. If it wasn’t for his tented towel I would think he was completely unaffected.

Chapter 19

With twenty-five minutes until our reservation, I walk down the stairs to the living room, finally ready. I struggle down each step in my toweringly high black stilettos and breathe a sigh of relief when I make it to the bottom without injuring myself. I pull down the form fitting black shift dress I’m wearing, conscious of how much shorter it is compared to my usual attire. I’ll be regretting wearing it if I fall in these damn heels.

I briefly contemplate running upstairs to change but Jesse is in front of me before I get chance. His blue eyes are bright and wide like the sky, twinkling like the stars in appreciation for my hard work.

Leaning in, he whispers breathily into my ear, “Michaela, you’re perfection. You continue to take my breath away. Take it, it’s yours.” He then kisses me far too gently on the cheek, no doubt being mindful of our company. When he pulls away, he reaches for my hand. His eyes clock the watch that decorates my wrist and his smile is blinding.

Wearing black pants and a deep purple fitted shirt, he looks phenomenal. I appreciate that he’s worn the color knowing that it’s my favorite and the effort is endearing. He’s freshly shaven with expertly styled hair and he smells delicious. Leaving me open-mouthed at his exquisiteness, he shrugs himself into a black evening jacket. I’m relieved I’ve made such an effort with my appearance.

He looks like a hotshot. My hotshot.

Minutes later we are cruising towards the coast and I have feared for my safety from the moment I sat in the car. Jesse has barely taken his eyes off me.

“Can you concentrate on driving…please!”

His eyes roll before reluctantly returning his gaze to the road ahead and I’m finally able to relax. A little.

“Sorry, it’s just that you look so different.”

“Good different or bad different?” I ask, nervously sweeping my bangs away from my eyes.

“Just different. It’s weird seeing you so dressed up. The only time I saw you in a dress and wearing makeup was at our prom. Whenever I’ve thought about you these last few years you’ve been in jeans and your Aerosmith T-shirt.” His expression is wistful. I imagine him to be picturing me with my frizzy hair and chucks.

“I still have that t-shirt. It’s a little tight now though.” He smiles lightly and I intend on leaving the conversation there, but he’s spiked my self-destructing curiosity. “Do you prefer me that way, in jeans and t-shirts?”

He doesn’t hesitate when answering. “I like you anyway I can get you, sweets. You’re beautiful, whether you’ve spent the best part of two hours getting ready, or you’ve just woken up with bed hair and panda eyes.” He winks teasingly and I cringe as I’m prompted to remember the morning after our reunion.

“Don’t remind me.” I scowl in his direction.

Jesse laughs, softly. “You’re even beautiful when you’re frowning.”

“Stop wasting your time with compliments. You have me. I’m yours.”

When we arrive at our destination,
alive
, a graceful gentleman dressed in a navy suit shows us to our table. Unfortunately we’re seated in the centre of the room, away from the long window that overlooks the harbor. I don’t want to ask for another table but I know that if it were Jesse in charge of our date then we’d have the best seats in the house.

I’ve only been to The Mariner restaurant a handful of times since it opened a few years back, but it’s the first place I think of when I want to eat out some place special. We reserved the balcony for our parent’s anniversary party last year and it was stunning.

I fondly recall how romantic the view is come nightfall. The harbor illuminates with light that radiates from the docked boats and the sweeping spotlights that line the pier. It takes on a magical feel and I’d love for Jesse to experience it.

Jesse orders a bottle of a particular wine, from a particular year, but I’m unable to register the specifics. I’m completely uneducated when it comes to wine. Wine comes in red, white and rose as far as I’m concerned, but when it arrives I’m surprised at how much I like it. Jesse samples a small glass, but then orders water. I insist he should drink and that we should get a cab home, but for some reason he’s determined to drive.

Taking in our surroundings Jesse muses about the fine décor, his interest no doubt activated from working on his own restaurants. He talks about the chandelier with its long lengths of pearls intertwining around the arms and hanging low above our heads like a piece of art. He’s pleased with the interior furnishings, pale and minimalistic, but nod towards the waterfront for inspiration with blues and greens accenting throughout. He muses excitedly about ideas for another of his business ventures and I enjoy seeing him so enthused by something work related.

“Anything catching your eye?” I pry as Jesse investigates the menu.

“I don’t know. It’s expensive,” he worries. I don’t know whether he’s being condescending or whether he is genuinely concerned that I can’t afford it.

“Jesse, I’m not poor. Please, a deal’s a deal.”

“Okay. I’ll have whatever you’re having.” He smiles, but his concern prevents it from reaching his eyes.

We choose well and our oyster starters and grilled sea bass mains taste heavenly. The conversation hasn’t stopped all evening and the wine has been flowing generously. I’m glad I’m eating so much else I’d be worried for my sobriety.

“I think you’re trying to get me drunk,” I accuse.

“Not at all,” he replies, grinning sheepishly. “I just want you to enjoy the wine. The drink is our compromise, remember?”

I hold my hands up, surrendering.

“Are you having a nice time?” I ask. He seems to be, but then he’s used to such luxury. This is probably run of the mill to him.

“An amazing time,” he says, emphasizing his words with steely eyes. Placing down his knife and fork I notice he’s finished his plate before I’ve even managed half of mine.

“You’re going to be bored now because I intend on eating this whole plateful, even if it takes me all week.”

“Good, it’s nice to be around a girl that eats,” he infers, unknowingly. I push back the unwelcome reminder of his previous bachelorhood, focusing on the fact that he’s now with me.

“Food as good as this, I could eat the lot. Is it good for you?” I ask, still worrying myself. “I wanted to find somewhere special. I know you must have high standards.”

He cocks his head at me, lightly frowning. “Sweets, it’s delicious, but you really didn’t need to find somewhere special. A tatty burger joint would have been just as good. It’s the company I’m here for, not the food.”

I smile with gratitude. “I just wanted to show you a good time before you left tomorrow.” Our faces fall in unison at the reminder, so I change the subject. “It’s a shame I can’t show you the balcony, you’d love it.”

“Why can’t you?”

“I think it’s just for private functions, special occasions, ya’ know.” I shrug sadly.

“I can’t think of a more special occasion than this. Leave it with me.” He winks confidently and gets up from the table. “Excuse me.”

Speaking to someone at the bar he tries to hide a pointed finger as he turns to face me momentarily before being led through a staff door. What on earth is he doing?

It’s a further few minutes before Jesse finally emerges with a different man to whom he left with. I have taken this opportunity to finish both my plate and glass of wine.

Striding back to our table he looks completely smug, a sly grin stitched to his face. I should find his self-assurance annoying, but instead I enjoy the little show he’s putting on for me. It’s obviously important for him to indulge in his riches, but knowing his life before this one, I can appreciate why.

“Come,” he commands, offering his hand.

I accept and follow him and an older gentleman with slick dark hair and a mahogany tan. We’re led up a spiral staircase, through a function room and then stop at the double doors that I remember lead to the balcony.

“Anything else I can get you, Sir?” asks the well groomed stranger.

“Yes, two glasses of your finest champagne, please.”

“Of course,” he says, before leaving us alone.

Jesse is smiling down at me and I can’t help but roll my eyes. “You’re looking very proud of yourself. How did you manage this?”

Opening the door wide for me and signaling with his hand for me to lead the way, his smile broadens. “Money, of course.”

He is close behind me as I walk onto the wooden floor of the balcony. “Of course. Money,” I reiterate, a little bitterly.

“Hey…” I’m pulled back gently and turned to face him, his hands resting on my waist. “Don’t knock money. Money buys moments like this.”

I smile apologetically, but the money issue continues to play on mind.

As I’m lead closer to the balcony’s edge, I’m caught off guard by the magnificence of the mariner. I shouldn’t be so surprised when I’ve been here before, but it feels completely different this time. Its quietness and serenity maximizes the drama of the view. Last time I was here, the music and bustling crowd must have lessened the brilliance.

Jesse’s arm is still wrapped lightly around my waist, but he is staring out to sea too. How could he not? Darkness hasn’t completely descended yet and the remaining light latches on to the ripples of the water, allowing us to behold the beauty of the never ending sky. Two pieces of land threaten to meet on the outskirts of the cove, and between them the sun is about to bid us goodnight. The sky is losing the burnt orange hews of a stunning sunset and the ebony night is almost upon us, full of promises.

Boats of all sizes and expense line the harbor and in the centre of them a pier pushes out to sea. The splendor of the view is only tainted by the realization that I should have brought my camera with me. I’ve taken photographs of this part of the coast before but never from up here.

Finally able to tear myself away from the view I turn and look at Jesse, trading one splendid sight for another. He’s watching me with alert blues.

“What are you tormenting yourself about now?” he asks, anxiously. I frown, not understanding. “You’re witness to this amazing view and you still look troubled,” he explains.

“That’s the problem. I wish I’d bought my camera.” I try to shake off the negativity flushing through me.

“Not a problem. We’ll organize for you to come back with your camera another time.”

“Just like that?”

“If that’s what you want then we can do that, anything to wipe that frown from your face.” He smiles warmly and I want to match it, but I can’t help but feel put out by his relationship with money.

“Everything’s so easy for you. You want something, you go get it.” I tut before I can stop myself. I’m fully aware that it’s not his problem he’s rich, neither is it a bad thing. I’m glad that he’s done so well for himself, but it will take time to get used to it.

It’s my problem, not his.

“I’ve worked hard for this money, Mickey.”

“I know…”

“And I haven’t been able to spoil you until recently, so excuse me if I want to make up for that.” His tone is a little off, annoyed.

“Hey…I’m sorry.” I hold his face in my hands, trying to halt the angst that I have stupidly created. “I don’t mean to seem ungrateful, but that’s just it. My old Jesse never had any riches so it’s...it’s weird,” I explain, eager to rectify this. “Give me some time. I’ll get used to it.”

His hands mirror mine as they caress my face, and his expression lifts from his previous sadness. “You best get used to it. Fast.” Our lips meet briefly, washing away any lingering negativity. “I’m going to spoil you. That’s a given that you’ll have to accept. Benjamin too, although I imagine he will come to terms with it a lot easier than you.” He smirks against my lips as he kisses me again, but when he leans back his features morph into a sober tightness. “Ya’ know, you’d get used to it a lot faster if you came back with me to New York.”

His words are ringing in my ears as I step back from him. He’s deadly serious, his face stern and his lips pressed tight together.

Before I can even attempt to formulate a response I’m aware of someone politely coughing behind me. A young man, concentrating on balancing two glasses of champagne and some strawberries on top of a tray, stands in the doorway looking embarrassed at his intrusion. Jesse smiles sympathetically at him and walks over to take the tray, tipping him generously before he leaves.

Handing me a glass of champagne and sipping gently at his, his concern returns.

Sampling a large portion of drink to steady my
rivalling concern, I ask, “Are you asking me to move in with you?”

He nods. I sigh.

I should have known it was coming and yet I didn’t. I’m completely shocked, and somewhat disappointed.

“Mickey, I’ve been thinking about how this is going to work, ya’ know, once I go back to New York and our best option is for you to come with me.”

“No, that’s your best option, not mine,” I retaliate, walking away and sitting on one of many scattered chairs. I feel my body sagging under the weight of what Jesse is asking of me.  The same thing Sebastian asked of me, and like a fool I followed him. Not this time. My life, my career, is just as important as his and I’m not about to belittle it by accepting this proposal.