Breaking East (9 page)

I woke first and took another long bath. My bones already felt more like my own again. I fancied the swelling on my knee had gone down a little, even if the colours looked more vivid and varied. My mouth looked better too and my eye was fully open but still no white to it. I spent some time trying to disguise the horror and making my hair look good. My new gear made me feel like a proper chic chick. I stretched some muscles, took a few deep breaths and listened to that inner voice. You can do anything when you put your mind to it, Atty. Dad was right. I felt ready to go and rescue some kids. Bring it on.

I crept around the room sorting out the stuff to chuck away. Yesterday’s shirt had to go, it stunk something rank. I kicked a shoe and it rolled under the bed. I glanced across to see if the noise had disturbed Stuart and he was lying wide awake watching me. He clearly woke as silently as he slept.

‘It’s rude to stare.’ I said.

He stretched. ‘Can’t help it.’ He swung his legs out of bed and stood upright in one swift movement. ‘I’m going to grab a shower then we’ll make a move.’ I couldn’t resist watching him walk to the bathroom door. He turned. ‘The kit looks good by the way.’ He pushed the door closed and a second later opened it again, a smoky look on his face. ‘Verrrrry good.’

I smiled, ridiculously chuffed. I couldn’t help but wonder what might happen when all the poop we were in got sorted. I sat in the armchair facing the bathroom door and waited for him to come out. No harm in enjoying the view.

The shower stopped and Stuart whistled as he packed stuff into rustling bags. There was a knock at the bedroom door. I hoped it might be breakfast which is why I opened it with a high degree of melodramatics, like a matador or something, eager to get the food in and the waiter out so I wouldn’t miss Stuart walking the room in his towel.

Gavin stood in the corridor.

‘Holy shit, Atty.’ He stepped in uninvited. ‘Who the hell did you rob?’ He looked around the ceiling before putting his hand on my hip and kissing me above my ear. ‘You look hot, babes.’

I checked the corridor but he was alone. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘I came to see my girl. Like I said, I’m going to look after you.’

The whistling from the bathroom had stopped.

Gavin sauntered around the room, touching the furniture, mouth open, wowing moronically in appreciation. ‘We could get a bundle for this stuff,’ he said. ‘Take it to that set-up over east.’

‘Gavin I don’t need you looking after me.’ I scrabbled around my head for an excuse to get him out of there. ‘I’m on a job.’

‘Really?’ He sat on the bed, bounced and gave an appreciative nod, like he was some smart-alec hotel inspector. ‘Joe asked me to come and keep you company while you lie low.’ He opened his arms. ‘And here I am.’ He chewed his lip and looked around the room again. ‘Aha.’ He removed the lid of the fish tank, rolled up his sleeve, and dunked his hand to retrieve my phone. His long skinny fingers looked ugly and distorted in the water. ‘This won’t disable the tracker, Atts. You were out of range for a few days though, where did you go? Joe’s been frantic.’

‘I was … around.’

‘Ah look, the battery has killed the fish,’ he scowled as he shook the drops off his hands. ‘Made the water stink too.’

The fish floated on top of the water, bug-eyed and slimy. Of course Joe must have known I’d been seeing Gavin. Joe knew everything, especially about me. He’d made it his job to know what I was doing, when, and with whom since the day my dad had walked. Other kids got away with all sorts but not me. Joe would have looked at Gavin on paper and deemed him suitable. Gavin didn’t do drugs, kept under the Law radar, and had a solid record of helping out the resistance as and when required. What wasn’t to like? The fact that he lacked ambition, slept around and relied on his lean good looks to get favours, slipped past Joe completely. In fact, two of those were admirable qualities if you were a geezer in charge of the resistance.

‘Atty?’ Gavin lay on the bed. ‘Come here.’

Oh God. ‘No. You have to leave, Gavin. You can’t stay here.’

He sat up. ‘Why?’

Still no noise from the bathroom.

‘Let’s go for a walk,’ I said, trying to sound calm.

‘Why? Not gone shy on me all of a sudden, have you?’

I squawked a laugh. ‘I need some air, that’s all.’

‘You do look a bit peeky-eyed now you mention it. All the better reason to have a lie down.’

‘No.’

‘I guess you scammed that soft guy Stuart for a few quids. Do you reckon you can afford a couple more nights here? We’d have a right laugh.’ He ran his hands across the bed. ‘Especially in this.’

My skin crawled. I thought about Stuart sitting and listening in the bathroom and my hairline heated up a sweat. ‘Well.’ I slapped my thighs. ‘I’m going to take a stroll, coming?’

‘I bet he tried it on with you though, didn’t he?’ Gavin looked delighted, excited even. ‘Eh? Them sort reckon all the girls on the west are easy. I bet you gave him a good smack …’ He stopped and looked away.

And then I remembered the last time I saw him. ‘Yeah, you know how I can give a good smack.’ I recalled the gawp on his face as he watched me getting thrown out of the pub.

He had the decency to look embarrassed. ‘It all happened so quickly, Atts. I tried to stop them, honest, but before I knew what was happening you were gone. And I didn’t know where and … I dunno. It all got a bit messy.’

‘Yeah, tell me about it. I bet you never told Joe you watched me getting battered did you? See this.’ I pointed at my face. ‘Look what they did to me and you stood there and let them. And you’ve got the fannicking cheek to prance in here stroking the bed and suggesting we have a laugh.’ I was panting so took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down and take control. ‘I need you to leave.’

‘But Joe asked me to come and get you, take you to a safe house. You know what he’s like. He’ll go mad if I go home without you.’

‘Tough.’

We stared at each other. Me knowing I couldn’t force him out. It’s only that mad, red-rage that gives me the adrenaline boost to do a number like I did on Carl.

Gavin reached for my hand. ‘But I’m worried about you. The other night? At your place? It meant everything to me. It’s only ever been you I want, Atts.’

Jeeesh. I wanted to leap and put my hand over his mouth or sing ‘La la la’ at the top of my voice like a kid ignoring a rollicking - anything to get him to shut the hell up. ‘Well it meant zero, zilch, sticky sweet nothing to me.’ Then added. ‘Not that there was anything to feel anything about, we didn’t do anything.’ I raised my voice for that last bit, to make sure Stuart heard. ‘I don’t want you, Gav, never have, now please leave.’

Gav’s look changed from one of pathetic weed to sneering cockiness. ‘Oh. Now I really do get it.’ He looked around, hunting for evidence. ‘He’s been here hasn’t he? You’ve been playing him.’ He stood up. ‘You’ve slept with him.’ He hooted. ‘You have. You’ve bedded an easty for info. Or was it just to get a night in a posh hotel?’ He looked wide-eyed and wired to the max. ‘All those times you’ve banged on about how all those over-privileged nob-heads are responsible for everything from the price of eggs to your mum getting her head knocked off and here you are shacked up in a hotel with some easty ponce and his wallet.’ He stepped forward, getting in my face, his breath spattered tiny specks of cold spit against my forehead. ‘You’re nothing but a slag. No. More than that. You’re a hypocritical slag.’

‘I didn’t sleep with him.’ Thank God.

Gavin didn’t hear me, or if he did, he ignored me. But he saw the blush. ‘Aye, so you should. Joe is going to go mental. You were told to stay away from him. I take it you forgot you were doing the job for M Gee?’ He paced and shook his head, a grim sneer puckering his nostrils. ‘I’ve been so patient with you too.’ He put on a whiney voice, ‘I just don’t feel ready, Gav. Maybe next time. When I’m not so upset over my dad or Fran or the weather or any other flaming excuse!’

‘That’s what you’re so pissed about, isn’t it?’ I yelled back. ‘Your ego taking a knock.’ I lowered my voice to a shouty whisper. ‘You’re mad because I didn’t choose you.’

‘Are you suggesting I’m jealous? He’s an easty.’ Like that explained it all. ‘His sister is no longer your problem. He isn’t your problem. He is irrelevant.’ He spoke slowly like I was the idiot. ‘Jealous, mmf. Whatever he did to you last night I can do better.’

Oh my frilly days. ‘Gavin, shut up.’

He snorted. ‘Looks like Atty’s got one hell of a crush going on.’

‘Don’t talk soft.’

‘Sure?’

‘Nothing happened.’ I sat at the table with my head in my hands.

Gavin sat on the bed.

No noise from the bathroom.

Gav didn’t raise his head to look at me but spoke with a steely edge. ‘Joe’s told me to collect you and take you to a place where we can lie low until he calls for us. And that’s what I’m going to do.’

‘I’m not going anywhere with you.’

His eyes were so dark, almost black. ‘You have to, Atty. Joe’s orders.’

I shook my head. ‘No.’

‘You have to let the big guys take over.’

‘Still, no.’

He switched tactics. ‘You’ve nothing to prove. Or put right. Joe will let this go as a one-off cock up.’

I folded my arms.

‘And we can move on from this too. You and me. Whatever’s happened, whatever you’ve done, we can work through it. We’re the same, we get each other. We’re players. I understand why you did it.’ He waved a hand at the bed. ‘We’re practical. We do what we have to do to get by. No easty will ever understand that.’

‘No, I’m not like you. Not at all.’ I spoke louder than necessary, made sure Stuart earwigging in the bathroom, heard good and proper. ‘I never play anybody. And I don’t need some weedy, lying coward to babysit me.’ The lying bit I threw in for Stuart’s benefit, I hoped he’d heard. ‘Tell Joe I’m going to find Gemma and bring her back to Basley.’

Joe would go nuclear if he went home and said that.

Gavin gave up any sort of tactic and simply dug his heels in. ‘I’m not leaving without you.’

Stand off. I searched for my dad’s advice.
Prioritise, Atty
. First thing, get Gav out of there, away from Stuart. I stood and took fast, huge strides towards the door. ‘Like I said, I need some air.’

The receptionist looked down her nose at me as we made our way through the foyer. At the door I turned back, bumping into Gavin who’d stuck close to my heels. I put my hands flat on the desk. ‘I haven’t been here all night,’ I said, ‘I came back this morning because I’d left my favourite knickers behind. So don’t go totting up all those three hundred quids, because it won’t get paid, okay?’

She widened her eyes, stepped back out of spitting range and looked at Gavin over my shoulder.

‘No good looking at him, if I wanted to kick off he wouldn’t stop me.’ I spun round and looked Gavin in the eye. ‘He couldn’t.’ And I flounced out the door.

Gavin stayed close but said nothing. I didn’t know where we were or where to go but when I saw the tops of some trees I headed straight for them. Maybe when I die, in my sleep or otherwise, I’ll have twigs in my hair and dirt under my fingernails. But these buildings and people were crowding in and getting on my buds.

The park was massive and the air clean and fresh. I walked as fast as my knee allowed until my breathing evened out and then slowed to a less painful strut.

‘Feeling better?’ Gavin smirked. ‘What was that all about?’

‘Don’t take the piss out of me, Gavin. I’m not in the mood.’

‘You left your favourite knickers?’

‘It’s complicated. And you wouldn’t get it if I told you.’

‘Have you eaten? I’ll buy you breakfast.’ He nodded towards a food stall. Several tatty tables with rickety chairs were scattered across a patch of dirt under the trees. ‘A sausage sandwich?’

‘No.’

‘I’m really sorry I didn’t step up in the pub. Genuine.’

‘Okay, you’re sorry. Now go away.’

He kept pace with me, hands in his pockets. ‘I’ve got a surprise for you.’

‘No thanks.’

‘You’ll like it.’

‘Doubt it.’

‘I know where your dad is.’

‘Course you do.’

He pulled a leaflet out of his hip pocket. ‘I was going to wait for a nice romantic moment but it doesn’t look like that’s about to happen, so here.’

I glanced down. ‘A propaganda drop. Yippee.’

‘Open it.’

The leaflet had been folded four times, like a fan, to fit into Gavin’s tight jeans. The front cover read, ‘
LONDON. Time to expand’

I tutted. I’d read similar headings a zillion times. All worded slightly differently but all meaning the same thing. Somebody somewhere was pushing for the starry-eyed notion of reuniting the UK, combining the counties, same Laws, same medical care, same education and so on.

‘Go on. Open it.’ Gavin said again.

So I did and what I read made my heart stop dead. I put my hand on my chest.

‘Are you okay?’

‘I don’t know.’ My heart thumped and raced to catch up. ‘Is this real?’