A Piece of Mine (8 page)

Their bed had to be braced up by bricks underneath so the mattress wouldn’t tilt when Della got in bed and bring him crashing over to her side, reminding him of his size. One night when they were sleeping, someone broke into the house. Don’t know what they came for cause Della and Smitty didn’t have nothing much special. Just one of these crazy people that don’t have sense enough to be honest and ain’t got sense enough to know how to be dishonest and rob somebody with something! Anyway, Della heard the noise and woke Smitty up. He lay there a moment then said, “Let’s go see what’s going on.” He hollered from the bed, “Who’s there! Who’s in this house?”

They got up and went into the hall and there was this dope addict or something looking raggedy and holding a gun. Smitty ran past him, going to get his gun, I guess, and Della got scared and tried to follow him past the robber, who was then squashed against the wall with Della screaming at him to let her go! She must have hit him or something, he was really trying to get out of that tight spot with all that mouth wide open screaming in his ears, and probably hoping somebody would come in and save him from his victims, but their house stood all alone and the cafe-bar across the street made so much noise, nobody could hear them. The gun went off around that time and Della thought Smitty had saved her when Smitty came rushing around a corner hollering Della’s name, guess he thought she had been shot, and the robber slid down the wall at her feet, dead.

Smitty hadn’t been able to find his gun. They grabbed each other and looked at the dead man; he had shot himself with Smitty’s gun … accidentally. Della said, “We gotta call the police!” Smitty said back, “Wait a minute! Let’s talk about this!” So they did. Smitty continued “Now listen … if
we call them cops we gon have a lot of trouble! That’s my gun! And I ain’t got no license for it! And I can’t prove I didn’t pull that trigger and put that gun in his hand! All them cops look at TV and ain’t no tellin what they gon decide happened here!” Della’s eyes grew even wider. “Well, what else can we do? We can’t throw him outside in the street!” Smitty shot back, “Oh yes we can! That’s just what we got to do!”

He ran to look out the window with Della following him, her large white flannel gown billowing around her. No one was in sight and the music blasting from the cafe. It was settled in Smitty’s mind … the dead man was going outside. Della started crying til Smitty slapped her into just whimpering and sniffling. She went to get her robe and a cap and Smitty went to get an old blanket out of his car. She noticed the blood that had flowed from the man’s wound and went to get a bandaid, Smitty came back and snatched it and stuck it in the man’s shirt pocket. In fact, they did all the wrong things you see on TV. They rolled the man up and when the cafe closed and all was dark they carried the corpse over to the empty lot and left it! Went home, cleaned up, wiped off the gun, put it back in the drawer and went to bed with Smitty explaining, “I didn’t kill him, you didn’t kill him, so we ain’t got nothing to do with it! He broke in our house, took our gun (everything was suddently “our”) and shot his own self! We didn’t know him before, we don’t know him now! So go to sleep and forget the whole thing!”… So they did. See, what I mean, something that’s big like death, they stepped over that like it was a broom!

Anyway, the police found the body the next day, took it somewhere and did something and since the man was black the case was closed, even with all those clues, stamped “killed by person or persons unknown … 
CLOSED!
” and that was that. Smitty and Della picked up their life and went on as usual. He felt real smart cause he had handled it real smart so he began to add, when they had arguments, “You ain’t got
no sense! If it wasn’t for me, a man in this house, ain’t no telling what would happen to you!” Della smiled at all that, she was used to it and she loved her Smitty!

Then this thing happened that made me wonder at them because they had been through such big things and this seemed little to me, you might say.

It was a day that Della had not been feeling well; maybe lost a baby or something almost as important; she was always talking bout having a baby and Smitty was always trying to make one. Also, her special cake for Smitty had burned while she was trying to untangle something in the washing machine wringer and when she put the cake on the sink, she burnt her hand and in flinging her arm out she hit the filled dish drainer rack. It fell to the floor and dishes and glass flew everywhere! She was barefoot and cut her foot tipping across the floor. She burst into loud, dreadful tears and ran into the hall past the sign that read, “God Bless This Home” through the pink door she had painted because pink made her feel like a woman going into a romantic bedroom. She flung herself across the bed onto the spread she had crocheted painstakingly to laugh and love on. She cried herself to sleep.

When Smitty came home, he did his lion’s roar at the door and receiving no answer he went through the house and found Della asleep and … he got mad! He started stomping around and shouting at her about the dirt (there was no dirt). The filthy kitchen (just broken dishes, that’s all). No dinner (well, there was none, but my lord!) The messed up favorite cake (as if it was on purpose) and anything else his little mind could come up with! He never did ask her what was wrong. He kept shouting, “A man this and a man that.”

Della swung her legs around and sat on the edge of the bed and tried to smile and explain. She was still trying to smile and explain when Smitty came rushing up and slapped her twice! One way and then back the other! Her arm must have shot out instinctively in reaction and she caught him
solid and he flew all way cross the room, through the door and hit the wall in the hall and blacked out! Now, that alone was bad enough but Della went and picked him up and placed him in bed! That Della was strong! So when he woke up, an hour or so later, he looked around him and … cried. Now he really was a man, ain’t no question, but he cried … him!… Smitty!

Della came rushing into the room at the sound of the crying and when she saw him she started crying too. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt daddy? What’s the matter, baby?” But he pushed her away, snot and spit flying, then he snarled at her from his pain … an ego can be a dangerous, painful thing. “Get away from me! Get away! I hate you, you big, fat, ugly bear! You a ape! A gorilla! You ain’t no woman!”

“But, Smitty,” she began to whine and try to ease him but he wouldn’t have any of that! He got up trying to move without showing his pain and got the little raggedy suitcase (they didn’t never go anywhere so they didn’t need no new ones) and began to throw things in it. Della’s eyes were big and red and swollen, she kept trying to grab his shirts and underwear from him, but he done stopped crying now and was really talking mean to her, calling her all kinds of names, sloppy fat bitches and things like that! It was untrue and it hurt her. You could almost see her drawing up, shrinking, every time a word struck her. Seemed like the words were razor blades cutting her to ribbons. This was her Smitty talking to her!

As Smitty got to the door he turned, “I can’t never live with you no more! You always gonna think you bettern me! That’s what you want … to be the man! Well, I ain’t staying nowhere I can’t be the man! You get yourself and your stuff together and get out of my house as soon as you get you some money! I’m takin all we got now cause I done made it all while you sat chere on your ass! You the man now, you can get you some more!” Della reached for him, “Please daddy, baby, please daddy, don’t go! Don’t leave me! I’m
SORRY
(she screamed that). I didn’t mean to hit you! Please don’t go! I’m begging you! Daddy, I’m begging you!” She grabbed his arm and such a hate in his face went down to his arm and he struck her so hard she just let go and stood there with her arms hanging, and her tears pouring, down. He left, leaving the door open so she could watch him leaving, wobbling away dragging that suitcase, taking the car. She finally shut the door and went to bed, for two weeks.

I tended her and checked on her but she wouldn’t eat nothing or talk and usually she’s a big talker. But time takes care of everything and time took care of her. Pretty soon she got up and got on out to find work. She was still grieving, but with every bad there’s some good and she was losing weight like thunder. Smitty had got him a room somewhere and was busy telling everybody everywhere that he done left Della, “Wasn’t gonna keep no woman who wants to be the man in his family, Della didn’t know how to treat no man but she would before he sat foot in that house again.” He meant it too … he said! But every day when he come out of that door at work, lunch and quitting time, he seem to be looking for somebody. Pretty soon, he would go to the windows and peer out all through the day, but nobody was there … least not Della. He let everybody know where he lived, but she didn’t go there either!

I caught her one day, just a cussing to herself, crying. I said, “What’s the matter with you Della?” “Nothing,” she answered, “Just repeating all the names Smitty called me so I don’t forget and go running out there after him.” Well, that was Della’s formula and it seemed to work. She didn’t go! As she kept crying and grieving she grew thinner and her clothes began to hang on her. She looked terrible, but didn’t care. I tried to make her eat but she wouldn’t.

There was a church social coming up and I talked two days to get her to go and even helped her to buy some new things to wear that fit her. I can tell you honestly that Della at 135 pounds was a whole new better Della than she was at 207
pounds! She was good looking!! And with that big, sweet, innocent, sad smile, she was pretty and the men let her know it! She danced every dance once I got her started, and laughed and laughed and laughed with happiness! Smitty wasn’t there, he was probably at the pool hall bragging bout his hold on her. I ain’t gonna say a lot about it, but there was a nice man there named Charles … and he took to Della like wet takes to water! Soon, they was going out together, being seen a lot. Smitty heard about it. He wanted to come around and save his ego at the same time so he began to come around the house and tell her she had to move out, he needed a place. I know he wanted her to say, “Come on home then,” but she didn’t. Instead she said, “Give me a month to see what I’m gonna do and how, then I be gone.” He didn’t really want that house, he wanted Della, but his pride and ego kept him from tellin her. I don’t really know what would have happened if he had told her, but anyway, Charlie told her to move in with him, he was buying his own house. She just said she would think about it.

One day Smitty came by to check on his “house” and Charlie was there. Smitty said, blustering, “Well, I’m here now and you better go! This is a husband talkin to his wife and you oughta leave!”

Charlie answered softly, “Well Smitty, I didn’t come to see you at your invitation … I came to see Della at her invitation, so you can’t tell me to go … only Della can do that!” Smitty said, taken aback, “This is my house! I say what goes on here! And this is my wife!” Della said softly, “This the landlord’s house and I been paying the rent Smitty, so it’s not your house.” She looked neat and clean and pretty and you could smell the food cooking! Smitty repeated, stubborn, “I want to talk to my
WIFE!
” Charlie said, just as stubborn, “When she tells me to go, I will!” Della said, “I invited him to supper Smitty, I can’t tell my company to go!” Smitty said, “I’m your man, invite me to supper!” Della said back “No … you said you wasn’t my man, that I was the
man. Charlie don’t think I’m a man.”

Smitty, quick to think wrong, “Why don’t he think you a man? What you been doin with him?” He balled his fist up! Charlie put in “I hope to marry Della some day.”

Smitty said, “She already married! To me!” They both looked surprised when Della said, “I ain’t made up my mind about anything!” She looked thoughtful for a minute then continued, “Charlie will eat supper, then he will go, then you can come back and talk.” Smitty was outdone! “Come back?” he asked. Della was up to it. “If you want to!”

So Smitty left, but before he was out the door completely Charlie said, standing in the doorway like it was his, “Smitty, I am interested in Della and she is my friend, so if I leave it ain’t so you can do whatever you want to her. Don’t hurt her, don’t touch her, because I will know about it!” Smitty left mumbling to hisself that wasn’t nobody gonna do nothin to him!

Now, all the time I been knowing Della, she always said how Smitty didn’t remember no birthday presents or Valentines day or nothing, she always gave him things, but when Smitty came back he was dressed up and had a bag of candy in his right hand and some flowers in his left hand. But he came in fussing, “Ain’t you gon offer me no dinner or cake or nothin? Are you just gonna give some to that Charles that don’t want nothin but to go to bed with you? Then he gon be gone, just like he done all them other women I done heard of!” Della jumped up and went to get some cake and don’t you think Smitty didn’t take heart from that! “Sure,” she said, “I got plenty cake. You want some coffee?” Smitty leaned back, smiling, “Yes, I would like some coffee, too!”

As he ate the cake, Della was quiet but he talked a lot about how well he was doing. “And I been thinking bout takin a trip, like a vacation!” Della sighed, he went on talking, “Maybe putting some money in this house to make it look a little better!” Della looked around the room and nodded. He smiled and went on “Might even go-head and try to get
one of my own!” Della’s eyes opened wide and she said “It must be nice to own your own house!” That encouraged him, his chest came out and he decided to play his ace card and hit Della with something that would wake her up and make her realize she didn’t want to lose him!

“Della,” he said, serious-like in a new deep voice, as he wiped the last cake crumb from the saucer with his finger, “Della, we gon have to do something … now … or I’m going to get a divorce!” The room was real quiet while Della stared at Smitty, her man for so long.

“You done found somebody else you love, Smitty?”

He laughed. “No, I don’t want none of these women that keep running after me! They worry me to death!” He flecked off a speck from his pants as he waited for her to cry out “I don’t want no divorce Smitty!” But she didn’t. She just sat there staring down at the floor and pretty soon tears came slowly down her cheeks. Smitty saw this and felt his point was won. He stood up and stuck his chest out saying, “Well Della, we can’t go on like this … I’m a man!” Della looked up and the tears stopped and dried. “I need a woman! and if it’s gonna be you then say so, if it ain’t, then I better get on bout my business and …(he leaned toward her) get my divorce!” He waited a moment for her to say the words that would give him his old good life back, but there was only silence, Della looking at the floor again. He straightened up and looked around the home toward the bedroom where he really wanted to go and lay his big pride down. He tried to think of a way to stretch his visit out, but had played his ace too soon, so he cleared his throat and gave himself the next invitation. “I’ll be by in a few days to get your answer and I’m gonna come with my bags, Della!” It was said almost like a question.